Crush...

Dear You, I'm sorry i'm not one to reciprocate the same kind of actions & words that you do & say. I'm confused, & i've been hurt multiple times to a degree unimaginable. I'm not one to get close to people quickly, anymore. I used to, i use to be innocent, free, & willing to connect with anyone & everyone on a level that would make everyone my deep, close friend. You may never know it's you. I could say "it's your blue eyes & blonde hair that got me!" but you wouldn't know if it's actually you, or someone else entirely. You're someone I have a crush on, take heed to my words when i say that you're a great person, & it's a terrible tragedy that my fear of being let down, my trust issue, & having to suffer pain again, has led me to keep myself in silence, to make me push everything & everyone away when i realize hints may be put out there. I'm not one of those girls who sticks around, & is the 2nd person in a equation where you have to figure out who you like more. Either i'm your everything, or nothing. Even though i am horrible at figuring out what i am feeling exactly.. The reason i can be so demanding (if i am), is because that's how i treat those who i like. Yes, you're a mere crush right now, but i like you with each new day. Because with each new day, i learn something new, something more about you. So, crush of mine, you may never know if it's really you i'm not the best judge when it comes to knowing if i should trust someone enough to let them. So, my blue eyed, blonde haired crush, if one day you find out it's you i'm talking to, look back on this. You're a funny guy, you're kind, you're sweet, you've got a great personalilty, you always treat me better than i deserve & you have such a strong testimony. I'm not even sure you like hanging out with me when we do have the chance to...but that's just because of my fear. While people love to be around you, i was told that people couldn't STAND to be around me. Who knows eh? What a juvenille term CRUSH is...oh well... -Whitney