Sunday, August 29, 2010

Reunion....

So i know i should be excited for the weekend to get here cuz of our big Annual Leavitt Family Reunion on Kolob but I can honestly say after everything going on right now i am NOT excited for our reunion this year, & dont want to go. I'd rather stay home alone, & i'd rather be here in hurricane for Peach Days. In my 20 years of life i can only remember attending Peach Days 1 time for sure, maybe 2 times max. I think it's time to change that number & attend Peach Days every year..

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

There is HOPE!

This is for the broken hearted. I know how you feel. Empty, betrayed, and no happiness whatsoever. You don't want to laugh, because you know it's not going to help, but you don't want to cry, because it will just make you feel worse. You feel like your heart is falling apart, but not only that, but you know soon your life is going to feel like it's falling apart too. You don't think it will ever end, and no matter what this person has done to you, it feels impossible to stop loving them. And everyone wonders why if they have hurt you so much, then why do you still love them. That's the confusing part, you don't know why, you just do, and the people who hurt you the most are normally the ones you love the most. And then, after a few weeks, you finally feel a sense of relief, like you're getting happy again, but you know inside that you're just going into denial. And after a few more weeks, you're back to where you were an empty soul and teary eyes. You thought you got over them, but really, you just stopped showing it. And you can't help but to show it again. It leaves deep scars on your heart that are there forever. And no one understands how you feel, and how deep you are hurt, no matter who they are, because it hasn't happened to them And even if it has, every broken heart is different. They don't know the true pain you feel and carry each and everyday now, so you learn that basically you are alone with all this. And the feeling starts to overwhelm you, and suddenly you just break down, right there, because you know you've had enough, the tears just instantly start flowing, and you're to the point where you don't care who see's. Because you've spent so many nights lying awake in bed, and so many days being haunted by the scars and fear of rejection. And in the midst of all these tears, you know that its not helping any, and it's not going to bring them back, if you ever even had them in the first place. After about a million tears have been cried, you finally pull yourself back together and keep going. Your throat starts to clench and your eyes burn with the tears you are trying to hold back. Everyone says, "It will be okay…” But you know it won't. And that’s the truth, it won’t. And you look back on all of the hurt you had from this, and you realize that people are horrible. You're still hurt, but you've learned to hide it so that everyone thinks you are okay. So now every time you see this person, you know you still love them, and you feel a slight tingle in your heart yearning for them to love you, screaming out, but for some reason they don't hear it. And then you sit back and wonder how one person could have caused all of this...
But dont worry one day you'll wake up & decided "what a waste of time it was to dwell on the sadness that one person caused me." One day you will be happier that you every could have imagined!! Trust me it happens, you'll realize life is happy!! :) THERE IS HOPE!! :)

Monday, August 16, 2010

My Eventful Weekend

THURSDAY: Went to Kolob with Dan, Sky, Sarah C, Chancen, Jordanne, Stephanie & Sara. It was way fun, i had my very 1st celestial smore & will never be the same! We were also serenaded by Dan, if you all didn't know he was famous way back when! If you see him, ask him about it!! :) maybe he'll sing his song for ya!!!
FRIDAY: i babysat the cutest little guy in the whole world, tate johnson, & took my grandma to her doctors appointments.
SATURDAY: sky & axton convinced me to go to the regional singles ward activity @ the lake, so we got on their 4-wheelers & headed out to the lake the backway takin the trail that came out right above the lake. I figured i'd be ok to not wear sunscreen cuz i already had my 1 sunburn this summer & already had my base tan started, we'll the 2 hours @ the lake & about an hour 4 wheeling back in my swimming suit. my shoulders are fried & hurt! The plan that night was i was going to go to the fair for the 1st time in 3 years (long story), but i guess plans fell through or there must have been a mis-understanding cuz when 8:00 rolled around i hadn't heard a thing.. So i text my cousin kenz & we went to the late showing of Eat Pray Love. It was a pretty cute show, & i love Julia Roberts.
SUNDAY: we went to church & if i would have known the a/c wouldn't be working i would have worn a ponytail & brought a fan! But my dad got a new calling. He is now known as the 2nd counselor to the Bishop. haha Guess thats what he gets for asking the stake president if he can be the "stake nursery treat coordinator" haha
What a eventful crazy weekend.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

DATING, HANGING OUT..or NEITHER...

Something scares you men. It's not terrorism, economic recession, global warming, or gasoline prices. These things might worry you, but something else makes your palms sweat and your pulse hit triple digits, that is... Asking a girl out on a date. That's because asking a girl out involves potential pain. If the object of your affection becomes aware of your intentions, she might not reciprocate, & that's going to hurt. I don't care if you're the most self-confident, well-adjusted person around; rejection hurts! It makes the remaining friendship awkward at best, humiliation at worst. Revealing romantic feelings is a risky business. Many guys find a way around the risk, or at least they think they do. Instead of asking a girl out on a date & being bold in their intentions, they turn to the soggy milquetoast alternative to dating... "Hanging Out".
Dont get me wrong hanging out every now & again is fun, but seriously what happened to the good old days when a guy would actually pick up the phone & call a girl to ask her out? Seems that now days it involves a text asking if they wanna hang or go do this, clearly not clarifying "date" or "hang out". Being a girl it makes the situation slightly awkward if you go thinking its a date, only to get there & there to be more girls than guys or visa versa. Its not that big group "dates" are bad, its when the numbers of girls dont match the number of guys, that bugs us.
I'm sure i'm not the only girl who feels this way, but i wish guys could just get in there head that dating is cool & more fun than hanging out.The end, thats all i gotta say!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Road Trip to Maries

So the past few days i have been at my friend Marie's house. Here is some of what we did:
-Watched Just Married, Cake Boss, Trama in the ER, Americas Next Top Model...
-Went to a water park called Cowabunga Bay. (stayed for 4 hours)
-Went shopping in Park City! At the AMAZING outlets & i got some excellent deals
-Helped Amy (maries sis) teach primary.
-Went headed to Temple Square. They currently have a replica of the inside of the Salt Lake Temple at the visitors center & we had a missionary experience while looking at it. (The inside of the slc temple is beautiful!!)
-Shopping at The Gateway.
-Laid out by the pool. (Got some sweet tan lines!)
-Watched THE BACHELORETTE SEASON FINALE! With with Marie, Amy, Brad (maries dad) & Darb (maries dads girlfriend) Hated the ending but i nothing new... they never pick my favorite person.
-And so much more, but i dont have time to go into much detail, i've got to go running, but what a wonderful road trip/weekend with Marie & her family!I can't wait for another one up that way or her coming down here!!!!
Here are a couple pictures from the weekend trip:

COWABUNGA BAY (not all of it cuz my phone couldnt capture it all)

Us on Temple Square :)